Demi, Think I Was Born W/ Eating Disorder

demiwoods2


Demi Lovato The Daily Mail interview: ‘My mother had to wake up and see that I needed help. She was so worried; she didn’t want to believe that her daughter was so sick.. I had been very upset and depressed for a while, but I could never say I needed help. I definitely have a lot more confidence than I did a year ago.’

On punching Alex Welch: ‘I was totally shameful and confused and upset. I was so embarrassed. I didn’t just have to pay consequences in front of the people around me, but in front of the entire world. I came clean after I hit the girl. Before that happened my mum didn’t know exactly how serious it was. She said, Why did you do this?’ I said, ‘Because I’m exhausted’ and she had to wake up..

..and see that I needed help. My mum was so worried. She didn’t want to believe that her daughter was so sick. I was very sick but luckily I got the help I needed,’ says Demi quietly, ‘and I’m here today, hopefully preventing young girls from doing the same things I did to myself. I know that I have a voice and can use it for good or bad. It’s a gift from God. I knew I could share my experience and be of service or not tell anybody and be like the rest of Hollywood..

..and hide my secrets. I didn’t want to do that.’ Demi was raised a Baptist and is now a nondenominational Christian. On Fix A Heart: ‘It’s about a break-up. It talks about bandaging the damage, I’ve been through self-harm. It was my way of letting out my innermost secrets.’ On ‘For the Love of a Daughter’: ‘It’s a very personal song. ‘Oh father, please father, put the bottle down..’ The lyrics are self-explanatory about my relationship with my estranged father whom I haven’t..

..spoken to in five years. I wrote it when I was 16 & getting it out is like therapy.. I think I was born with an eating disorder, because I’ve never had a relationship with food that was normal. I remember looking in the mirror with nappies on thinking, ‘You’re fat, change it. I started overeating when I was about eight; I was a binge eater. I would bake a whole plate of cookies and eat them all.

Then when I turned 12 I was bullied in school and they called me fat. I went from being an overeater to stopping eating & I lost about 30lb. From then on I continued undereating, but my weight plateaued.’ Anorexia turned to bulimia: ‘I started throwing up to lose weight.’ Demi is Part-Mexican, part-Italian and Irish. Would Demi describe her childhood as happy overall?

‘Totally. My stepdad provided me with an amazing childhood. I played outside like a normal kid, I rode my bike and I walked to school but the happiest times were when I was acting.. I started doing beauty pageants and acting. I needed to be the centre of attention; I knew that I wanted to be a little superstar.’ On Camp Rock role: ‘It was so exciting getting the role. I was extremely blessed.’

‘I need somebody who’s going to be there for me at any point, day or night, and is not going to be afraid of my eating disorder and recovery process. I want a man who’s going to be strong’ Home schooled because of the bullying, the family moved from Texas to Los Angeles when Demi was 15. As her career took off with the Camp Rock films, another Disney movie Princess Protection Programme, and her music career, the addictive behaviour intensified. ‘It was just a matter of manipulating situations and hiding, you get very clever and very secretive. The tricky part about this disease is that you start lying to the people around you and turn into someone that you’re not. It’s scary.’

Compounding her eating disorder, the troubled teenager was cutting herself. ‘I started when I was 12, when I was bullied. It was my way of dealing with the stress and then I often resorted to it when I was feeling overworked. Girls [who self-harm] scratch or cut themselves with razor blades, scissors or sharp objects, or burn themselves. I’ve pretty much tried all of it. My main thing was cutting and that was so horrible. I definitely self-medicated with drugs and alcohol. I would be lying if I said I didn’t,’ she adds. By the time Demi made it to rehab, she was desperate and ready to change her life. ‘The key is that you have to want it. The problem with a lot of celebrities is that they go into rehab, but they don’t stay for the full amount of time. I wanted to go home after 30 days, but they told me, “No, you’re not better.” I went through 14 hours of therapy every day. It wasn’t fun. There were sessions from seven in the morning until nine at night: Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Anorexics and Bulimics Anonymous and Self Mutilators Anonymous. [To addicts like Demi, all meetings are relevant, whatever their own personal addictions.] It was constant emotional work and exhausting; by the end of the day, all you wanted to do was sleep.’

What helped, she says, was being among women of all ages and from all walks of life. ‘It was very humbling. I had been used to waking up in hotels, getting room service for breakfast and having my room cleaned. Now I had to make my own bed. I wasn’t allowed to use the bathroom by myself because they were afraid that I was going to purge, and we weren’t allowed to have razors, so I had hairy legs,’ she giggles. ‘And we had no mobile phones.’ ‘There’s no cure and I may mess up, but I want to be a better role model for my fans’ Today she has her ‘roommate’ Sarah with her, a ‘recovery companion’ who has also been through addiction problems and follows the same programme. Her role is to support Demi in the recovery process and promote a healthy lifestyle. ‘She is living with us, she watches me and makes sure I eat three meals a day,’ says Demi. Inevitably, one of the most challenging aspects of rehab was learning to eat normally. ‘Breakfast would be at 8.30am, a bowl of cereal with yoghurt or milk and fruit.

Lunch would be a sandwich, salad and fruit or vegetables. Dinner might be macaroni cheese with a side of vegetables and milk. I cried often because I was terrified at having to eat three meals a day. I said, ‘No, this is too much food.’ I started eating just so that I could go home. I don’t know what made it click but I realised I just wanted out of my eating disorder. ‘Now I can eat as many meals as I am supposed to and not throw up any more. There’s definitely temptation, every meal I fight it. It’s an addiction and I’m going to have to fight it for the rest of my life,’ continues Demi. ‘There’s no cure and I may mess up, but I want to be a better role model for my fans and my younger sister. There are days when I look in the mirror and think, ‘God, my jeans don’t fit today, this sucks.’ But I’m in a much more spiritual place now. I can pray and I have a great support system around me.’ That support comes from her family and from friends including reality star Kim Kardashian and fellow Disney performers Selena Gomez and Miley Cyrus, who stayed in constant touch while Demi was in rehab. ‘They called me and kept checking in on me and I never forgot that. Now they make sure I am doing good. Out of all the people in the world, they are the three who are really close to me.’

Demi was also reportedly helped in her recovery by her ex-boyfriend, actor Wilmer Valderrama, from whom she has recently split (he played Fez in the US sitcom That ’70s Show). When I ask about him, though, Demi hesitates before saying, ‘I would like to keep my love life out of this. I’ve learnt not to go public with a relationship because the break-up will be 20 times harder.’ She does go on to tell me that she has a better idea of what she wants in a boyfriend. ‘I come with baggage,’ she says with a wry smile. ‘I’ve been through a lot and I need somebody who’s going to be there for me at any point, day or night, and is not going to be afraid of my eating disorder and recovery process. I want a man who’s going to be strong.’ ‘I know that I could be in a fragile state of mind if I go back in front of the camera; I’m not really confident enough’ As we chat she peruses the gorgeous outfits and sighs at the prospect of trying on clothes for our photo shoot. ‘I’m not looking forward to that. My recovery is still a work in progress; they say that body image is the last thing to change, and I still battle with that every day. But I definitely have a lot more confidence than I did a year ago.’ In fact she looks lovely. Slim but not too thin, her face is make-up free, and her skin is clear with a healthy glow.

She’s wearing lots of jewellery and there are tattoos covering the scars from the wounds she inflicted on herself over the years. ‘I have nine or ten,’ she says, holding out her arms to show me. On her wrists are the words Stay Strong (one on each). ‘I have Peace, Rock and Roll on my fingers, Faith on my arm, a cross on my hand, feathers on my ribs and a feather behind the ear.’ Demi can’t yet face returning to acting. ‘I know that I could be in a fragile state of mind if I go back in front of the camera; I’m not really confident enough. The camera adds 10lb and I feel like I have too many tattoos right now to go back on screen. I want to act again if they can find a way to cover my tattoos and one day I’d love to be respected as an actress.’ For now, music is her focus:

‘When you are on stage singing, you are far away from people, you’re not up close and it’s very liberating.’ Her goal is to ‘win a Grammy’ and interestingly she cites pop superstar Rihanna as her role model. Like Demi, the 23-year-old singer has had her own difficulties. Rihanna was the victim of domestic violence, but since the end of her abusive relationship with musician Chris Brown three years ago, she has become a global phenomenon. ‘I haven’t met Rihanna, but we’ve talked over the phone and I want to meet her so badly. I love her attitude; she’s sexy and confident. She’s gone through quite a lot and has come out strong. I would like to be the calibre of Rihanna and hopefully one day I’ll get there. I’d love to do a duet with her!’

LOVATO’S LOVES

MUST-HAVE MAKE-UP
Estée Lauder Double Wear foundation — it
lasts a long time and gives really great coverage.

ESSENTIAL ACCESSORIES
I love my rings — they make me feel safe
and secure and I feel naked without them.

STYLE ICON
When it comes to the red carpet
I love Kim Kardashian (left), who is a friend of
mine. I also love Fleetwood Mac’s
Stevie Nicks — she has really great style.

MUSIC I LOOK UP TO
Rihanna (left) and Katy Perry.
I’d love to be on their level.

SAVING UP FOR
A car — I’m going to get a matt black Range Rover.

MOST LIKE TO BE STUCK IN A LIFT WITH…
Someone really attractive,
such as Gerard Butler. I think he’s
gorgeous; he is so masculine.

  • Joe chief

    She needs to STFU about her eating disorders. It’s getting annoying. It looks like she’s trying to become more relevant with the whole story.
    —-

    Again i say to you. Why should she shut up about it when YOU guys bring it up? If anything YOU make her relevant since YOU talk about her. Maybe if you actually KNEW what relevant was, you’d realize that what you are saying is complete and utter stupidity.

  • Joe chief

    Live.Love.Learn. said:
    Why is this still being talked about? Talk about beating a dead horse…we get it already. WHY DON’T YOU ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING ABT IT INSTEAD OF JUST TALKING ABT YOUR SOB STORY DEMI? She’s all talk.

    Why is it still being talked about? Well maybe because YOU talk about it? Because YOU bring it up? WHy should she stop talking about it when you are the one that continues to bring up the topic? You give her attention YOU drive her cause forward. SHE actually did something about it. If you bothered to read the news. I guess we imagined that rehab stint right? idiot.

  • Alice

    How can any of you actually sit and say she’s overreacting? Evidently, you have never been through anything like this in your life. It’s something you can’t escape from because it is an entirely mental problem. Eating and cutting disorders are serious serious problems that not everyone (and you’ve all just proved that) understands. Demi is using her power with the media to raise awareness and show that it can happen to anyone, even someone with a supposedly “perfect” life like everyone assumes Demi has. Just respect her courage to speak out about it rather than STILL dragging her down.

  • marinawashiski

    She needs to STFU about her eating disorders. It’s getting annoying. It looks like she’s trying to become more relevant with the whole story.

  • marinawashiski

    James1 said:
    You aren’t born with an eating disorder. Demi’s problem is that she is too thin skinned. When kids at school called her fat, she freaked out and began starving herself and throwing up. What really drives me crazy is that Demi thinks she’s fat and ugly when she is actually a very beautiful girl with a great body.

    ——-

    IA. I don’t understant why she can’t love herself, she’s gorgeus, I wish I looked like her.

  • l?veislouder

    I’m pretty sure this is the interview Demi says all of her words were made up. this doesn’t sound like how Demi speaks.

  • classicalmusicplayer

    Eating Disorder is a choice. It may be a choice you make early on in your life and you may not be aware of it but it’s a choice.

    I don’t think she’s tottaly ok yet. I think she needed more time off. She was only off the scene for like three month, about two of which was in treatment. I think she came back to soon.

    She needs someone that’s not famous or use to be famous as a bf. Someonee that can just follow her around and hold her but I think she needs a lot of time before she dates.

  • Joe chief

    Ijustneedyounow said:

    Feb 19, 2012 @ 07:01 am
    kristin6410 said:

    It may seem annoying to u but ppl with eating disorders it helps them knowing someone else went thru it and got over just like they can and need to continue on like that. @lovemestealmeawayy i do believe gay ppl were born gay
    ———–
    a few days ago i talked about this with 3 of my friends who all have eating disoders (i know one of them from the rehab i was in a while back) and they were both so annyoed and pissed off at demi. they said things like “it’s easy to be a hypocritical bitch and simply idolize your own body-type and bash everybody who’s figure you’re jealous of” or “it’s easy to say be healthy if you have a dozen of bodyguards that protect you from physical harm of bullies that might hurt you when you don’t look the way they wan’t you to” and “how hypocritical is it to praise curvy bodys and than have yourself photo-shopped thinner and put that picture as your twitter background and shit” and i also read a lot of comments of people with the same problem on the net that were all saying that they don’t like what demi does so she clearly doesn’t seem to help as many teens with eating disorders as her fans like to think
    —-
    So you mean to tell me that your friends are vapid and unintelligent morons who get pissed off at celebrities for no reason then? I dunno for some reason it seems like your friends and people LIKE your friends are far and few between. You might want to tell your friends to get a better education. Either that or get better friends.

    Well then it’s safe to assume that your friends are stupid. Either that or they don’t pay attention to celebrity gossip she never said anything like this. So Yeah. Your friends are lame. Wait what does her bodyguards have to do with anything? Her bodyguards are paid to keep her alive from murder’s psycho fans and stalkers. Not prissy littler random idiot drones who bring up off topic BS like her bodyguards for no reason. Plus I don’t see how her bodyguards have anything to do with her therapy. Again…huh?

    Well those people are few and far between. For the most part she actually DOES help people. She wouldn’t been honored by these groups if she didn’t do so and wouldn’t have gotten this much publicity if that wasn’t the case. Only idiots from sites like AD would say something like this. And those morons don’t count. So yeah…again. Your friends suck. And they are clearly idiots.

  • kristin6410

    It may seem annoying to u but ppl with eating disorders it helps them knowing someone else went thru it and got over just like they can and need to continue on like that. @lovemestealmeawayy i do believe gay ppl were born gay

  • inhumancreation

    An Eating Disorder can be formed due to a chemical imbalance in the brain. It’s rare someone is born with one but it’s possible. She wasn’t born with an eating disorder, her parent’s never taught her the proper way to eat as a child, she was given food when she wanted rather than when she needed. The weight then played an important part of her eating disorder as she starved for an ideal body image, not because she had a poor relationship with food.

  • l?veislouder

    It may seem annoying to u but ppl with eating disorders it helps them knowing someone else went thru it and got over just like they can and need to continue on like that. @lovemestealmeawayy i do believe gay ppl were born gay
    ————————–
    as do I. no one would choose to live the life of hell some gays have to deal with, and no one would choose to feel like they have no way out other than suicide like some gays do. no one would choose to live like that, and then die like that.

  • AcidPinkLemonade

    Okay Demi, we get it. This is all she talks about now.
    However, I think her problem is, she lets what people say about her get to her head and is easily-influenced by what she sees and hears.

  • Joe chief

    AcidPinkLemonade said:
    Ijustneedyounow said:
    “it’s easy to be a hypocritical bitch and simply idolize your own body-type and bash everybody who’s figure you’re jealous of”
    =============================
    I agree.
    What happened to being healthy? Being too big is just as bad as being too thin and it depends on your height.

    Yes because she said that one type of body is better than the other right? Oh wait…she didn’t? Oh wait you guys are putting words in her mouth? Oh wait you lack common sense? Yeah thought so.

  • BrokenArrow

    Ok. What really irks me is that some of her fans thinks she’s ‘cured’ now cause she went to rehab. Please, if this is true and she had problems since she was a kid i dont think just a few months in rehab were enough. Obviously shes still is in treatment but idk she doesnt seem ‘healthy’ to me.

  • Joe chief

    So your friends are pissed off at a celebrity that they don’t know? No offense but your friends are idiots and morons then. Only an idiot would get pissed off at twitter quotes or interviews that don’t pertain to them. You must hang out with really shallow people.

    Yeah that sounds like something your stupid friends would say. It’s a known fact that fools like your moron friends would say idiotic things like this. Seems like if anyone is jealous or shows some examples of jealousy it would be your idiotic friends. I mean out of the blue they talk about her for no reason? Seems like they’re the new that care enough to talk about her. Also what does her body guards have to do with anything? Seriously explain that to me? Do your friends just like to make up random bs out of the blue? Seems like a personal problem with your friends rather than an actual one.

    Well those people are few and far between so they don’t matter. It’s like the survival of the fittest. You’ll have a bunch of people who do care and do think she helps a lot of people, which she does, and then you will have a group of morons thinking otherwise out of selfish interests. Which your friends fall into. Natural order of things.

  • kristin6410

    @loveislouder. Yeh i was watching this one show were this gay guy told his parents and they were like we cant have a gay son u can be apart of the family when ur straight. The boy was like do u think i wanted to be like this. It was very touching

  • Live.Love.Learn.

    Why is this still being talked about? Talk about beating a dead horse…we get it already. WHY DON’T YOU ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING ABT IT INSTEAD OF JUST TALKING ABT YOUR SOB STORY DEMI? She’s all talk.

  • JelenaRocks

    I LOVE U DEMI

  • Ijustneedyounow

    Feb 19, 2012 @ 07:01 am
    kristin6410 said:

    It may seem annoying to u but ppl with eating disorders it helps them knowing someone else went thru it and got over just like they can and need to continue on like that. @lovemestealmeawayy i do believe gay ppl were born gay
    ———–
    a few days ago i talked about this with 3 of my friends who all have eating disoders (i know one of them from the rehab i was in a while back) and they were both so annyoed and pissed off at demi. they said things like “it’s easy to be a hypocritical bitch and simply idolize your own body-type and bash everybody who’s figure you’re jealous of” or “it’s easy to say be healthy if you have a dozen of bodyguards that protect you from physical harm of bullies that might hurt you when you don’t look the way they wan’t you to” and “how hypocritical is it to praise curvy bodys and than have yourself photo-shopped thinner and put that picture as your twitter background and shit” and i also read a lot of comments of people with the same problem on the net that were all saying that they don’t like what demi does so she clearly doesn’t seem to help as many teens with eating disorders as her fans like to think

  • AcidPinkLemonade

    Ijustneedyounow said:
    “it’s easy to be a hypocritical bitch and simply idolize your own body-type and bash everybody who’s figure you’re jealous of”
    =============================
    I agree.
    What happened to being healthy? Being too big is just as bad as being too thin and it depends on your height.

  • Anonymous

    It’s not that there dragging her down it is the fact that she is this cute little girl by day and a not CUTE little girl by night.Like she is using this to propel herself and people are getting tired of this.If people think she is fake or is making this hogwash.They are not going to believe this.There are alot of things missing.

  • l?veislouder

    @loveislouder. Yeh i was watching this one show were this gay guy told his parents and they were like we cant have a gay son u can be apart of the family when ur straight. The boy was like do u think i wanted to be like this. It was very touching
    ————–
    that’s so sad :(
    there was a show I was watching about a man trying to “cure” homosexuality, and he made his research and opinion very public. turns out, his own son was gay, and when it got to them talking about it, the father suggested using his studies on him, and the son shouted, “WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN CHANGE ME ANYMORE THAN I’VE ALREADY TRIED TO CHANGE MYSELF?!” and I felt so bad :( no one would be gay if it were as simple as “choosing” to be straight. you don’t choose who you fall in love with, and you don’t choose what attracts you; it’s just there.

  • Anonymous

    You need to stfu hater!. Demi isn’t trying to do anything and obiously it’s interesting you,because you took the time to write the comment!.

  • Anonymous

    You need to stfu hater!. Demi isn’t trying to do anything and obiously it’s interesting you,because you took the time to write the comment!.

  • Anonymous

    No people ARE not born homosexual, they say that because they want you to believe it’s better.

  • Joe chief

    Well then apparently you’ve been reading the wrong book all this time. If you bothered to crack open a SICENCE book you’ll know that people with ED’s tend to be born with a chemical imbalance. So you may not be born with an ED but you are born with genetic predispositions.

  • xAskTaylorx

    I laugh at this! You can’t really be born with an “eating disorder”? Can you? Doesn’t make sense in my book.

  • mayaMONSTER

    That’s because you haven’t had one. It is a mental illness, so yes you can be born with one. I was. Demi makes perfect sense.

  • Joe chief

    jbx3 said:

    Stfu Demi who the fuck cares bitch gosh your story is annoying as fuck so over it get something new to talk about in every fuckin interview your not the only one with eating disorder problems so stfu about it and stop trying to become more relevant with your lame story, your fucking irrelevant joe Jonas was the only person who boosted up your career and he will probably be the only one who will Since your and idiot
    —–

    1. I know person who cars about what “this B**ch” says. And that person is you since you commented on it.
    2. Why should she talk about something else when YOU guys are the ones that still talk about it?
    3. If she is irrelevant, again why are you responding to a TOPIC about her? Seems like you don’t know the meaning of the word IRRELEVANT. Use a dictionary doll.
    4. Joe Jonas didn’t do anything to boost her career. DISNEY boosted her career.
    5. I find it funny you call other people an idiot yet you can’t even say “You’re an idiot” properly. Not to big on grammar are we?

  • jbx3

    Stfu Demi who the fuck cares bitch gosh your story is annoying as fuck so over it get something new to talk about in every fuckin interview your not the only one with eating disorder problems so stfu about it and stop trying to become more relevant with your lame story, your fucking irrelevant joe Jonas was the only person who boosted up your career and he will probably be the only one who will Since your and idiot

  • lov2shop123

    No, I don’t think you can, but when you struggle so long with it you believe you were just bored into it.

  • Joe chief

    entertainmentlove said:
    Will she just stop I loved her at first but now it’s overreacting much -_-
    —-

    Again why should SHE stop when YOU guys keep talking about it? YOu talk about it as much as she does. Why should she stop when YOU talk about it? Dumb ass.

  • entertainmentlove

    Will she just stop I loved her at first but now it’s overreacting much -_-

  • mimi

    I think demi is beautiful and she has an amazin body and great curves she needs to embrace that! a lot of girls will kill for her body right now!

  • Joe chief

    lovemestealmeawayy said:
    people think they were born gay too..but they were not.
    —-
    Actually yeah you ARE born gay. If we could change who we were attracted to, then there would be no such thing as gay or straight. Hard on’s don’t lie my friend.

  • lovemestealmeawayy

    people think they were born gay too..but they were not.

  • forthemoment.

    Actually, it’s been proven that people with eating disorders do infact have something different going on in their brain, so yeah, i guess you could be born with an eating disorder.

  • Joe chief

    James1 said:
    You aren’t born with an eating disorder. Demi’s problem is that she is too thin skinned. When kids at school called her fat, she freaked out and began starving herself and throwing up. What really drives me crazy is that Demi thinks she’s fat and ugly when she is actually a very beautiful girl with a great body.
    —–

    You may not be born with an eating disorder however you’re still born with genetic predispositions TO said eating disorder. It’s a known fact that people who suffer from ED’s are born with a chemical imbalance. I won’t go into detail about it but I trust you are smart enough to actually do some research into the topic at hand?

  • James1

    You aren’t born with an eating disorder. Demi’s problem is that she is too thin skinned. When kids at school called her fat, she freaked out and began starving herself and throwing up. What really drives me crazy is that Demi thinks she’s fat and ugly when she is actually a very beautiful girl with a great body.

  • virendra

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  • Joe chief

    Ijustneedyounow said:
    (replying to this) – Feb 19, 2012 @ 02:43 pm
    mayaMONSTER said:
    That’s because you haven’t had one. It is a mental illness, so yes you can be born with one. I was. Demi makes perfect sense.
    ——-
    i had one and i can tell you that i for sure was not born with it
    —-

    No but you were born with genetic predispositions TO ED’s. Again if you bothered to do some research you’d see what she was talking about. Again Am I the only one here with common sense?

  • Ijustneedyounow

    (replying to this) – Feb 19, 2012 @ 02:43 pm
    mayaMONSTER said:

    That’s because you haven’t had one. It is a mental illness, so yes you can be born with one. I was. Demi makes perfect sense.
    ——-
    i had one and i can tell you that i for sure was not born with it